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The last time I felt growing pains, I was graduating from college. My first column series was titled “From College to Real World,” and that transition terrified me. Where would I work? How would I make a living? What if no one was hiring? What would my five-year plan look like? 

It was all very overwhelming. I look back on it now, remembering my first week out of school, and I was jobless and a little bit lonely. My five-year plan eventually crumbled into dust right there at my feet. 

Thank God it did. 

Two weekends ago, my boyfriend became my fiancé, and this spring, he’s becoming my husband. (Yay!) Once we returned home from our engagement trip with some friends last week, I started to feel those old familiar growing pains again. The slow-spreading anxiety prompted by new plans, unknown outcomes, and––just like in college––goodbyes. Except this time, not goodbyes to my friends. Goodbyes to my family. 

On this side of wedding planning, it’s been hard to focus on the exciting parts of my quickly approaching new life. Right now, I’ve been experiencing the stress and fear of moving out of my home, leaving my family corner, and becoming a wife. 

When I was at my maid of honor’s house the other night, I asked a lot of questions about how her parents fared after their youngest got married and moved out. Her little brother is the one who brought me a lot of comfort. 

“Everyone’s going to feel something. Good or bad, everyone will have some feeling about you getting married. I didn’t see my dad for weeks after she got married. He went through some depression.” 

“Depression??” I asked, letting my head fall in my hands. 

“Yeah, but not depressed that his daughter got married; that’s just life. He was adapting to change, is all.” 

I’ve paused the venue search today to write this column and to start focusing on the other side of wedding planning: the actual life after the wedding. Sure, new stresses will come, and I’ll be searching for a job, and I’ll be a new homeowner, but that’s just….growing pains. And growing pains don’t hurt all the time. Sometimes, it’s like a nice stretch after a long nap: refreshing, much-needed, and rejuvenating. 

And aside from all those new experiences, I’ll also never have to go to sleep by myself ever again. I’ll never have to call him during the day just to chat because I miss him. I’ll never have to schedule times to see him. I’ll always have my movie-watching, Mr. Pibb-loving, tiramisu-eating best friend. 

I might now know exactly what the next five years will hold, and I might not have wedding planning under control just yet. 

But I know I won’t be alone, I know it’ll be an adventure, and I know I’ll never have been happier.