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Dear Aunty Pam,

 

Our first child, ‘Kelly,’ is getting married in a month. She’s planned a beautiful wedding and hired a DJ to play dance music during the reception. As ‘Mother of the Bride’ my wife can’t wait but I sure can. 

 

The problem is my wife seems to think she’s still 25 with a great figure when it comes to receptions. We went to a wedding last year and during the dancing (and a couple of glasses of champagne) she went out on the dance floor and I was mortified. She was wiggling and giggling and throwing in dance moves that were meant to be sexy but I just wanted to climb under a table and hide. She’s in her mid-50s and a pretty big gal. 

 

I know it’s going to be a touchy subject to bring up because when I told her she’d embarrassed me after that wedding, she didn’t speak to me for 3 days.

 

How can I stop this from happening again?

 

Signed,

Scared Hubby

 

Dear Hubby,

 

Welp, I’m not sure why being a ‘big gal’ has anything to do with her dancing, in your eyes, inappropriately, but Aunty Pam will forge ahead.

 

When you think back about it, is it possible that everyone else was having a great time, including your wife, and perhaps it was only you who felt ‘mortified?’ Or did she really go over the top and leave everyone with their eyes out on stalks, horrified? If so, as it is your daughter’s wedding and her big day, perhaps having a quiet word with her is in order to let her take the lead? 

 

Your daughter might just say, “Oh, Dad, let her do what she wants, it’s a party, after all!” She might also say, “Yeah, I really don’t want Mom dancing around like a stripper looking for a pole.” And if that’s the case, maybe keep the wine away from Mom, if possible, or serve her wine spritzers comprising of 95% club soda and 5% wine. 

 

And how about this, Hubs? How about dancing with your wife so you can not only enjoy the celebration together as the loving couple who created this beautiful bride, but also gently suppress any attempt of her twerking? Especially near the pastor.

 

Cheers, dear!!

Aunty Pam