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Dear Aunty Pam,

 

I’m in the doghouse because I asked my wife if she wanted an apple fritter.

She’s on a diet—heck, she’s always on a diet—and I did the grocery shopping last week. After I finished, I went past the bakery department at Ingles, and they were selling apple fritters for buy one, get one free, so I bought one, ate it, and took the free one home to Brenda. 

The way she acted, you would think I tried to give her something awful. She started hollering about how I was trying to sabotage her diet, and I should know better than to try to bring her home something like that when she’s counting carbs. 

I got pretty hot and hollered back that, for God’s sake, it’s just a fritter, and evidently, she doesn’t know how to count carbs anyway because even after being on a million diets, she’s still fat. 

She hasn’t spoken to me since except to throw my truck keys in the yard when I asked her if she’d seen them. 

Why would a woman get so riled up over a fritter?

 

Duke

 

Dear Duke,

 

Sooooooooooooooooo….I don’t really have a response, Duke. Other than that, good luck!

 

Cheers, dears!

Aunty Pam