“…A nine-year-old girl travels
all night by train with one suitcase and an orange.
She learns that mercy is something you can eat
again and again while the juice spills over
your chin, you can wipe it away with the back
of your hands and you can never get enough.”

~ Excerpt from “The Mercy” by Philip Levine

This is the time of year everyone’s loaded up with resolutions and determination to make ’em stick, at least for the next week or two. Mine, as ever, are lowly and few because I know by July, I will most decidedly have not lost down to size two or made that million dollars. Not happenin’. However, I am determined this year that my pants will stay up. You see, time and time again, I’ve bought those denim/lycra stretchy jeans that look and feel marvelous on your legs. Even better, they still look like jeans. Just with some bounce and stretch.

Guys don’t seem to wear them or maybe it’s a secret if they do, but women everywhere love ’em. Legs that hurt? Vein issues? Tired legs? Yes, they feel great on all those. However, within three minutes of putting them on, they start trying to become plumber’s jeans — riding lower and lower in the backside, making you tug and pull ’em up, up, up. Only to creep down, down, down.

Up and down, up and down. Hoist and tug! Finally, you’re forced to go find a belt to tighten the culprits securely, hold them back from becoming hipsters or knee-sters. At that point, you can’t breathe as well, or eat much from the ever-tightening noose around your waist. You wonder if you’re the only person on earth these jeans act like this with. You don’t see other women pulling and pulling theirs up all day. It’s akin to stockings that droop, sag, and bag! Why on earth does something that seems to fit perfect just NOT? Is it a trick pulled off (no pun intended) by belt manufacturers? Could these jeans truly be the plumber’s best friends? Hand me the pipe wrench and cover your eyes!

Saluda Welcome Table is every Tuesday, with dinner served from 5:30-7 p.m. in the fellowship hall of Saluda United Methodist Church. All are welcome; donations are accepted.

Don’t forget to save box tops for Saluda School: collection containers are located in Saluda Library, Saluda Post Office, and the school’s office.

There’s still time to honor a loved one with an engraved brick paver for Pace Park. Proceeds go toward building public restrooms at this community park to be located downtown near M.A. Pace Store. For additional information, contact Catherine Ross at 828-749-3534 or carnc@charter.net.

The Historic Saluda Committee meets Jan. 8 at 2 p.m. at Saluda Library.

Goings on at the Saluda Historic Depot this month include the premiere of “Scanning History” film with Dr. George Jones, Jan. 10 from 3-5 p.m. and Saluda Train Tales, Jan. 22, 6:30 p.m. Both are free and open to the public.

Women’s Club meets Jan. 12 at 10 a.m. at the Presbyterian Church on Carolina Street.

Ward’s Grill will host a free veterans’ breakfast Jan. 21 from 8-10 a.m. All vets are invited!

The Social Singles of Saluda have a potluck Jan. 21 at 5 p.m. at Saluda Center. All single men and women over 40 are invited.

Saluda Center will have a community potluck and bingo night, Jan. 25 at 6 p.m. Everyone is welcome.

Saluda Community Land Trust (SCLT) will benefit from your donations for this year ahead, or your time as a volunteer for their many community projects. Make your resolution to help! Contact SCLT at 828-749-1560 or visit www.saludasclt.org.

The Saluda branch of Tree City USA meets at 5:30 p.m. on the fourth Thursday of the month at  Saluda Library.

Happy January birthday to Nora Parks Anderson, Brandy Bradley, Alex Bardos, Carolyn Ashburn, Scott Kinard, Donna Bond, Greer Eargle, Wyatt Alan Pace, Irma Anderson, Paul Aaybe, Rich Rauschenbach, Phyllis Arrington, Kenneth Justus, Cheryl Harbin, and Avery Lena Mintz. Please add your name to the list! No ages mentioned unless you’re under 2 or over 100!

Thank you for reading this column, dear readers. As ever, the goal is to make you feel like you’re enjoying small town life in a friendly little mountain town called Saluda. Feel free to contact me at bbardos@gmail.com or 749-1153. I always love hearing from you! Or visit bonniebardosart.com for more writing and art, or find me on Facebook.